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Heart broken

How to Deal With a Broken Heart

Jan 20, 2022 |
By Dean A. Hickman, MD
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Sooner or later, we all must experience getting our hearts broken. While time heals all wounds, it doesn’t help when you are in the thick of a heartbreak. It doesn’t matter if the heartbreak stems from a romantic relationship, losing a family member or saying goodbye to a pet; it still hurts. It’s best to find healthy ways to deal with your pain and come out stronger on the other side. Here are some simple things you can do to help mend your broken heart.

Give yourself time and space

After a breakup or loss, it might feel like your world is falling apart. It’s natural to feel sad. Don’t pressure yourself to get back to feeling OK. Give yourself the time and space you need to feel what you feel. Don’t get bogged down with giving yourself a deadline; everyone heals at a different pace.

Don’t dwell on your pain for a long time

While you are giving yourself time to heal, it’s important not to stay in your feelings. Allow yourself to acknowledge, process and express your feelings. Give yourself a reasonable time to do this every day. Once you have given yourself this time, shift your focus to something else.

Reach out to friends

We all have different kinds of friends, from those who are like family to casual acquaintances. When you are going through a rough patch, reach out to those friends whom you trust. It’s always a good idea to ask them if they are emotionally available to help you talk through your feelings. It will also help if you can let your friends know what you need. For example, if you need to talk, ask them to just listen. If you are looking for advice, ask them beforehand if they can provide you with some guidance.

Exercise

Getting up to exercise might be the last thing you want to do when you are feeling upset. But exercising has so many health benefits that go beyond losing weight. Exercise releases endorphins, which are chemicals the body produces to relieve stress and pain. Don’t feel like you have to sign up for a gym or buy expensive equipment. Just going for a 30-minute walk can help boost your mood and clear your head.

Get a new hobby or revisit an old one

Sometimes our relationships have a way of distancing us from the things we enjoy doing. This is an excellent opportunity to try something new or venture to do something you have always wanted to do. You can even get back to those hobbies you had before your relationship. Give yourself this time to learn or relearn a hobby.

Accept you might not get closure

When a relationship ends, it’s normal to want to get closure. For many people, closure is seen as the final step of a relationship. However, not all relationships end as neatly as we would like. The best thing you can do for yourself is accept that sometimes you don’t get the answers you are looking for.

Don’t sabotage yourself

Any type of loss can take a toll on your emotions, so it’s important not to make decisions out of anger or sadness. Don’t sabotage yourself by trying to rush the healing process and making poor decisions. Before making any kind of decision, ask yourself if you are doing so out of anger. If the answer is “yes,” then don’t do it. Give yourself some time to clear your head so you won’t regret your actions later.

Remember you are enough

When experiencing a relationship loss, it can feel like part of you is missing. You might also find yourself feeling incomplete. Remember, this is an illusion. You are enough on your own. Your sense of worth does not depend on someone else. Don’t forget you are already a whole person with exceptional qualities. This pain won’t last forever, so take a deep breath. You got this!

If you’re feeling anxious, you can speak to a licensed therapist face-to-face from home via a virtual visit.

Tags
heartbreak
broken heart
mental health

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